Hope you are all healthy; body, mind and soul.
It has been a while since I have written a blog post. I would say it is because I’m taking exams currently or I have a lot going on, but these are just excuses. If I wanted to write then I would, or even if I had anything to say. The truth is, I didn’t know what to say. It is one of those things, the longer you go without saying anything, the harder is it to actually say anything.
I have been struggling a lot recently with anxiety and insecurity. I have to work really hard to manage these daily. Right now I want to tell you about the little victories that I want to praise myself for. Today I had an exam, one I was particularly nervous for because we hadn’t had that much guidance on. This makes revision stressful, you can revise lots of things but you never know if much of it will help (especially when you’re sat infant of that exam paper, struggling to breathe and even remember how to write your name)
Even though I could have jumped up and down with happiness after I finished the exam, I have been wondering today how I actually performed. Was it a good length? Was my introduction relevant? did my conclusion actually conclude anything? then suddenly that happy feeling I felt walking out of my exam didn’t matter, because all I felt was the worry that I had messed up.
The little victories are the things that matter the most, and sometimes, things that we may even consider part of daily life, need to be acknowledged….I got out of bed. I drove in a city where I have never driven before and didn’t get overwhelmed. I got to my exam. I answered the question. I spent the whole hour writing while ignoring the severe hand cramp. These all add up. You may look at these points and think they are dumb, but then I would say you are dumb (just kidding). It is okay that the things I am proud of are different to things you would be, if anything it is healthy. Life would be boring if we were all the same.
Moral of the story is, we need to be proud of our little victories and stop being so harsh on ourselves, we are doing okay.
P.s. I won’t leave it so long next time to write
(Featured image – Biograd – Croatia)
Love Em x